An almost forensic look into why exactly a nice, well educated boy from Liverpool, ends up on death row in Indiana. 

Looking back, from his prison cell, Carl Kelly takes us on a journey through his happy childhood, through family breakup, chronic sibling jealousy, as his little sister breezes through a successful career and marries a wealthy entrepreneur, and his slide towards deviancy as his efforts to make his mark in the world fail repeatedly. Everything leads to his final terrible act designed to give him what he craves. Notoriety.

Reviews

A riveting psychological study of the random thoughts and vivid memories of a convicted murderer in Indiana - on Death Row.

Pat, the author, recently messaged me from Europe to confide that "whilst writing it, I was watching a documentary on prisoners on Death Row. Being there for them was like a badge of achievement." They would soon die! That placed them far above the rest of the prison hoi polloi.

This book is wonderfully well written.

But first a warning: it contains foul language, violent images and sexually explicit scenes.

***

Now, first of all, when I say this convict's vivid memories seem real, I mean to say something about these memories' intensity, for I know that a person under extreme stress can experience a phenomenon known as hypnagogic hallucination.

In fact, I know this fact from direct experience.

This winter, we were dreaming about a move to a smaller residence. Though it didn't pan out, my stress at that busy time came through hynagogically at bedtime. Flashes of memories as I fell asleep!

You may not know the feeling of being on Death Row. But I think you can SMELL the feeling of the fear you'd feel. That's almost hypnagogic.

Your now-precious past suddenly feels more Real.

That's the first reason why I loved this book.

The second reason, is as the great thanatologist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross memorably tells us: there are various stages of preparing for Death:

The first is Denial.

You know something bad is going to happen, but your sanity pushes that evil safely out of your reach! So you dwell on the pleasant past, to be safe. Until the past becomes a Vortex, as in Krapp’s Last Tape by Samuel Beckett.

Christ said to not resist evil, but for me that rule has exceptions! I had to hold my nose and fight nausea at the grotesque evil goings-on in this maximum security prison. And if you do that, the convolutions of the story will impress you.

Aporia. That's exactly the way Pat reports it. This book is So Real in this regard, it's Downright Gritty. At times the Vortex becomes Unspeakable Horror, as thinly veiled adolescent longing, formerly suppressed, now blossoms.

Into Les fleurs du mal!

So the buildup is extremely good. And Pat knows his criminology too...

And this is my third reason for my four stars:

When convicted criminals, awaiting death, begin to see the fact of their death - with its necessary delays as their queue slowly shortens - that knowledge hammers in the Great Value of all Human Contact NOW.

All we have in this world in the end is relationship. It’s a dance. And this is the beginning, as Kubler-Ross says, of the final thanatological step of ACCEPTANCE.

So, again, it is all here in this book.

The killer's human contacts in this prison become the Highlights of his Day. He almost learns love - through a glass darkly.

Now perhaps I've painted too many hearts and flowers for you... Death is too real for us all for it to make much sense. It's not always logical, and it's not always quick. And sometimes the pieces just don't fit. And at times the pieces stink!

Make no mistake: death can be a awful, slow process sometimes.

***

So now, what?

Remarkably, now we feel Compassion for this Killer! He could even be someone we know.

We FEEL an edgy sort of love for his good intentions run awry.

And that's the wonder of this frank writing, at Pat's proven calibre. Thanks, Pat.

An Excellent Book!!

Fergus, Quondam Happy Face (www.goodreads.com)

I received a copy of this book from the author for which I am extremely grateful. The opinions in this review are my own and have not been influenced!

In Patrick Murray’s novel The Trips, the reader is thrown into the twisted world of Carl Kelly, a prisoner awaiting execution and the events that eventually led to his fate. Told through various perspectives of those close to or around Carl and his own memories, the story will keep you on your toes, starting with page one. From thinking that you know exactly what will happen next to staring wide-eyed at a short but important story shifting paragraph, this novel explores the numerous decisions and circumstances that can shape someone who might have already been doomed from the start. Witnessing key events from his and his sister’s childhood, through to struggling as a young adult between his selfish and self-absorbed personality and the wish to be successful, you can never be quite sure where the story will take you next. The Trips deals with human nature, the topic of jealousy and the wish to show the world who you truly are. At the same time, themes like violence, the question of insanity, and how close a family should or shouldn’t be are discussed. Rest assured that you will want to keep turning the pages to find out how Carl came to be imprisoned and if it could have been avoided at some point in his life.

The main character of the story, Carl Kelly, might have taken me on one of my wildest trips yet while reading. I would recommend this book to people who are interested in social and psychological influences on upbringing and life, and why humans do what they do, especially when turning to a criminal decision. As someone who is interested in True Crime and the psychology of people who commit crimes, I thought that I had it all figured out after starting the book. Still, the way Carl’s character is build by Murray made me hesitate in my initial opinion from time to time. This is where I want to mention the thing that I valued most while reading; the exploration of Carl’s character development. It would be more than a stretch to say that he is a likable character, quite on the contrary, not once did I really like him. But that is exactly what makes the reading experience so captivating. Even though I didn’t particularly enjoy his personality and choices, I nevertheless found myself entering this strange connection to someone who I knew would commit a crime that led to him being sent to Death Row.

Through back flashes and detailed storytelling, Murray made every character (even the very unlikable ones) feel real. Apart from Carl, another interesting and captivating character is his sister Emma. The story, and Carl’s thoughts, set her up as someone we watch cautiously. Her perspective and thinking turn her into a human that we should all be able to connect to on some level. Through her, the book also discusses important societal issues, such as unplanned pregnancy. To me, these discussions were realistic and poignant, it didn’t feel unnecessarily dramatic or overplayed but rather well executed. With Emma comes also the character of their mum, another highly discussed person in Carl’s life. The book in fact starts with the interesting quote “His mother would always say that he was such a nice little boy, without really meaning it.”

Going from this first insight into the mother’s thoughts on her son, the author uses foreshadowing and psychological developments to lead us down the road to Carl’s eventual downfall. Carl is described as a leftover, he starts to steal and with every new (criminal) activity, the reader can observes his slow descent into what he will finally become. I especially want to highlight the obsessive techniques and thinkings that, sadly, motivate Carl to become the best at what he is doing, may it be manipulating or stalking someone. While the psychological escalation is always in the back of the reader’s mind, it nevertheless surprises you, especially towards the end. All of these instances make you dislike the main character but it is an excellent observation on how and why some people do what they do. One sentence especially stayed with me, “Carl felt he was falling into hell. And he wanted to take everyone with him.” Without giving away too much, I would highly recommend this to anyone who wants to dive into the mind of a slowly escalating criminal. It is a truly interesting read.

If I had to criticize one point, and I am doing this while still recommending the book, it would be the sometimes vulgar language. I completely understand that it is necessary and useful for portraying some of Carl’s thought patterns but it felt a little overdone on some pages. Apart from this, the overall writing style is fitting and helps to carry the story along. The start is a little slow and it takes some time to get into the narrative but it is definitely worth it. Murray may not make you laugh or cry but he will definitely make you want to finish the story and find out why and how everything led to the final outcome.

To come to an end, I want to mention that this is of course a book that will not appeal to everyone. The subject matter is difficult to comprehend and read. If someone is not interested in psychological aspects of criminals and the sometimes graphic depictions of actions and thoughts, then The Trips is not the book for them. I would recommend this to those who have an interest in why some people become ‘evil’ or how their evilness is influenced by circumstances and their psyche. While the story deals with these heavy and sometimes disturbing topics, it never feels exploitative and there is also a big focus on those around Carl Kelly and how his actions influence them. I appreciated the writing style that reflects Carl’s reality and his thought patterns in a detailed way and made me race to my lunch break to continue reading. I honestly didn’t expect that this story would captivate me this much but here I am writing a rather lengthy review. To come to a close, I would like to end by citing two more sentences that led me to think a lot about the psychological aspect and influences of why people turn into criminals and which ultimately fully pulled me into the story. It is a short quote but encapsulates the essence of how society, and also criminals, see themselves from time to time, “He was wrong from birth. That was Carl.”

LiMaB (goodreads.com)

Holy cow what a book!! I love me a good thriller and umm this for sure checked off all the boxes. Yet this was still really different. I mean this was intense. We follow an inmate and his stories of his life before he is put to death. Umm I will say if you don't like dark books maybe skip this one or be sure to check the warnings for you. Me personally I loved this book. I loved learning about Carl and his life before. Getting into his mind. Knowing what made him tick. I just love learning about people like this and the ins and outs of their life. This book was just pure awesome. I loved it. I need more by this author. I wish this were a true story so l could research more about this man. Definitely a book I will recommend to everyone!!!

Amanda Felton (goodreads.com)

This is the second Patrick Murray book I have read and I felt that it is even better than the first, which I also really enjoyed. This book is  first and foremost the life story of Carl Kelly and how a normal young Liverpool boy ends up on death row in Indiana. It takes us through his school days , growing up with his perfect sister, who he loves but is also jealous of, through university, to his jobs in the financial industry down in London and then America. But it is ultimately far more than that, the story is cleverly told by a series of reminiscences by the Carl on death row, and flash backs to the periods in his life that led him to where he is now. It is a brilliant picture of 80s and 90s working class life in the UK , how the people thought and acted. It is also a portrait of a family breakdown, how it affected those involved and how they reacted and interacted in the years to come because of this trauma. 
Whilst it is a story of one person's descent towards the ultimate crime of hate, it is also the story of the love that people have for him through his life, and how that all comes together very poignantly at the closing of his life. 
What I also really enjoyed were the characters who were present all the way through the book, how they interacted with Carl, and sometimes each other and how we learnt more about their own stories and lives as the years progressed.
Difficult to categorise in any particular genre, it is just a well written novel, that regardless of what you feel for the main protagonist, and I have to say, I personally disliked him very quickly, you have to read on to find out more !!

Adrian (www.goodreads.com)

Woahhh, what a read this was, I love, love, love a thriller that is dark, twisted, and completely different to any other thriller I have read! The Trips is just that and more... when I read the blurb, I knew that this would be interesting and to have a fiction book that feels almost like this could have happened. The author has done his job! I do enjoy a true crime store, and the fact this had the MC on Death Row this was right up my street.

There are quite a few trigger warnings, so please check them out before reading this.

This was so well written, and the author does a fantastic job with his descriptive writing, etching out the journey, the why of the actions, and the feelings that our MC had giving us a glimpse and allowing us to delve deeper into the mind of a death row inmate. It was gripping, and I didn't want to put it down.

Honestly, my review doesn't do this book justice, I give this a read, I will definitely be reading more by this author.

Christine (www.goodreads.com)

I started it a while ago but didn't have time to read it as fast as I would want. When I finally had time, I suddenly wanted to read it slowly and think. And after this think again. In other words, it is not a book you will read and forget what it is about in a few days. It is a book that will leave imprints on your mind.

The story tells us about Carl, a Brit who is waiting on the Death Row in the US. As we know, executions are not done overnight and prisoners have plenty of time to analyze what they did and why. While waiting for his fate, Carl has flashes of memories about his childhood and all his previous life.

Nowadays, with the fast development of AI and the ability to analyze huge data sets, our society is confronted with a series of important questions. Can we tell that a child can grow up to be a criminal? Was the crime inevitable or was it possible to prevent events that led to it? Was there a turning point when was possible to interfere and change the events? What made a person become a criminal: his family, society, character or the victims themselves?

In The Trips we have a detailed description of Carl's life and see the evolution of a quiet shy boy into a prisoner on the Death Row. To tell my thoughts about whose fault it was is to spoil the pleasure of reading the book and I recommend the reader to do it alone.

Be ready that it is a book with some foul language in places and with scenes of violence and sex. But again this is a book for adults and we can deal with it.

I think this book completely earned a 4-star rating.

Svetlana (www.goodread.com)